ADHD Overwhelm: Getting an Adult ADHD Diagnosis

Stephanie Queen

ADHD in adults is a relatively new area of understanding. Once thought of as primarily a childhood disorder, we now know that ADHD often continues into adulthood. It manifests as a cluster of symptoms that can cause significant impairment in daily life. Yet, despite significant advances in recognising and diagnosing ADHD, much of what happens in the body and brain is still being figured out.

At the core of ADHD are differences in brain chemistry, particularly with neurotransmitters like dopamine and norepinephrine. These chemicals play key roles in reward processing, motivation, and attention. But ADHD is far more complex than a simple chemical imbalance. It's increasingly understood as a disorder of regulation, affecting attention, activity levels, impulse control, and emotion.

ADHD and Dysregulation: A Spectrum of Challenges

ADHD can be seen as a disorder of dysregulation, meaning it affects your brain’s ability to maintain balance across several functions. Whether it’s difficulty focusing, fluctuating energy levels, emotional highs and lows, or struggles with impulse control, each of these challenges relates to a broader issue with regulation. Emotional dysregulation, in particular, can be distressing often manifesting as rejection sensitivity dysphoria (RSD), where perceived rejection or criticism is felt in an intensely painful way.

Crucially, ADHD isn’t episodic; it’s not something that comes and goes. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition that begins in childhood and continues throughout life. Many adults especially women may have been overlooked in childhood because symptoms are often less obvious and, as a result, less recognised.

It’s also worth noting that ADHD often coexists with other mental health conditions, like anxiety or depression. In fact, up to 70% of people with ADHD have at least one additional diagnosis. This can make it challenging to untangle which symptoms are driving the overwhelm. ADHD is also linked to higher rates of addiction, with individuals often seeking out stimulation through work, technology, or substances to compensate for an under-stimulated brain.

Embracing Your Neurotype: It’s Who You Are

It’s important to remember that ADHD is a neurotype a natural variation in how your brain works. ADHD is not something to “fix” or change; it’s an essential part of who you are. ADHD is not just a collection of challenges but also a source of unique strengths. People with ADHD often bring incredible creativity, resilience, and innovative thinking to the table. Shifting from solely managing challenges to harnessing strengths can be transformative. Neurodiversity is about recognising and celebrating these differences rather than trying to fit everyone into the same mould.

Navigating ADHD Overwhelm: The Reality of Adult Diagnosis

For many adults, receiving an ADHD diagnosis can bring a mix of relief and grief. There’s often excitement at finally understanding why certain aspects of life tasks that others seem to manage with ease have felt so challenging. But this is often followed by a deep sense of loss or regret. Many people express feelings of missed opportunities, wondering how different their lives might have been if they’d received support earlier.

It’s important to honour this grief. Many adults diagnosed later in life feel that they’ve never been able to reach their full potential. Recognising the difficulty of navigating life without understanding or support is part of the healing process. While an ADHD diagnosis brings clarity, it’s also a reminder that ADHD is a lifelong condition that requires ongoing management. This can be made even harder by a world built around neurotypical standards, where stigma, societal barriers, and systemic obstacles still impact neurodivergent individuals.

Managing ADHD: Practical Strategies for Everyday Life

For adults with ADHD, managing the overwhelm starts with stabilising the body and mind and building routines that create structure. Here are three essential pillars:

1. Sleep Regulation

Sleep disruption is common in ADHD. A racing mind often makes it difficult to wind down, leading to sleep deficits and daytime fatigue. Regulating your sleep cycle is key. Establishing a consistent bedtime routine, reducing screen time before bed, and creating a calm sleep environment can all help. While naps might feel tempting, prioritising a stable sleep schedule is essential for managing ADHD symptoms.

2. Morning and Evening Routines

Intentional routines at the beginning and end of the day can help reduce feelings of chaos. Many adults with ADHD feel rushed in the mornings, scrambling to get ready. Creating a simple structure like laying out clothes the night before or setting aside time for a peaceful start can make a significant difference. Similarly, winding down in the evening with calming activities can ease the transition into sleep.

3. Time Management and Task Planning

Time management is a challenge for many with ADHD. Learning to use simple tools like a task list, planner, or calendar can be incredibly helpful. Keep things straightforward complex systems often add to the overwhelm. Focus on building habits that are sustainable, and release any shame around needing help or outsourcing certain tasks. It’s not about trying to do everything but recognising what’s manageable for you.

ADHD and the Challenge of Coexisting Conditions

It’s important to recognise that ADHD often coexists with other mental health conditions, such as anxiety or depression. Up to 70% of people with ADHD have at least one other diagnosis. This complicates the picture, making it harder to pinpoint which symptoms are driving the overwhelm. ADHD is also linked to higher rates of addiction, with individuals often seeking out stimulation through work, technology, or substances to compensate for an under-stimulated brain.

Understanding ADHD means looking at this broader context. It’s not a matter of self-blame or lack of willpower ADHD is a different way of processing the world, and it comes with its own set of strengths and challenges.

Certainly, I can make the ending more professional and grounded. Here’s a more straightforward, reflective conclusion:

Moving Forward: Life After an ADHD Diagnosis

Receiving an ADHD diagnosis as an adult can be a turning point, bringing clarity to how your brain functions and why certain aspects of life may have felt uniquely challenging. Effective ADHD management doesn’t mean conforming to neurotypical standards. Instead, it’s about finding what genuinely works for you. For some, this may involve medication, but managing ADHD is never a one-size-fits-all approach; it’s a process of understanding your unique strengths and limitations, stabilising foundational habits such as sleep, routines, and self-compassion and building from there.

1. ADHD Heritability (70-80%)

• ADHD has one of the highest heritability estimates among psychiatric disorders, with studies suggesting heritability between 70-80%. This statistic is widely supported by multiple studies in genetics and psychiatry.

• Source: Faraone, S.V., & Larsson, H. (2019). Genetics of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Molecular Psychiatry, 24(4), 562-575. https://doi.org/10.1038/s41380-018-0070-0
  

2. Depression Heritability (~40%)

• Depression’s heritability is often cited at around 40%, though the specific range can vary slightly between studies, with some estimates between 30-50%.

• Source: Sullivan, P.F., Neale, M.C., & Kendler, K.S. (2000). Genetic epidemiology of major depression: review and meta-analysis. American Journal of Psychiatry, 157(10), 1552-1562. https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.ajp.157.10.1552

  
  

3. 70% of People with ADHD Have Con-Occurring Conditions

• Studies suggest that up to 70% of individuals with ADHD have at least one comorbid psychiatric condition, such as anxiety or depression.

• Source: Wilens, T.E., & Spencer, T.J. (2010). Understanding attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder from childhood to adulthood. Postgraduate Medicine, 122(5), 97-109. https://doi.org/10.3810/pgm.2010.09.2206

  
  

4. 3-4 Times Higher Rates of Addiction in People with ADHD

• Research indicates that individuals with ADHD are 3-4 times more likely to develop substance use disorders compared to the general population.

• Source: Kolla, N.J., & van der Maas, M. (2015). Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder and criminality: A review of the literature and implications for the management of legal matters. Attention Deficit and Hyperactivity Disorders, 7(3), 139-158. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12402-015-0164-5